This morning I awakened with laughter over the dream I had. I
dreamt that a friend and I were flown via helicopter to the desert, to
visit an exclusive "hot-house". This was no ordinary hot-house with mere
plants, it was also the home of freaks; a freaky-fun house, where a
pageantry of nature's perversions prevailed.
After disembarking from the helicopter, my friend and I walked up
to a window and each paid a $500.00 admission fee. The window was only
large enough for the hand (disappointingly normal) to reach through and
scoop the cash inside, and return two tickets that each read "admit one".
An arrow above the minuscule window directed us to a set of double doors,
with a ticket slot to the right. After inserting our tickets the doors
opened slowly, and mechanized groans were heard, accompanied with
vibrations which moved through the ground beneath our feet. When the doors
were fully open, the floor began pulling us inside (like a huge metal
tongue, drawing in fresh nuts to feed the growling machinery.)
There were plants (cacti) and tables with chairs around the
periphery of the cavernous enclosure. A very tall water fountain stood in
the center, disporting a cascade of magenta- colored water. I heard my
friend shriek with glee and as I turned to him, I too, screeched in
excitement. We were awed by the svelte and lanky chanteuse of the house.
She stood on a small stage in a diorama booth in the corner of the room,
singing in German. She wore a beehive-style hairdo of the 60's, and was
dressed in a peach-colored chiffon gown. Her image was one of elegance
and refinement, except for one thing: Unlike the ordinary human mouth,
hers was vertically positioned, below a normal nose and face. Her set of
teeth were pristine-white (identifiable as left and right, instead of
"upper" and "lower".) When words escaped through her parted vertical lips,
her cheekbones expanded outward; when her lips closed her cheekbones
contracted, discontinuing the "swollen" countenance of her face. Yet she
spoke with perfect clarity and diction and had a lovely, lilting voice.
The next exhibit was of a little girl clothed in a pink dress,
with a paisley pattern. Up to the mid-torso she was as normal as apple
pie. Her head however, was shall we say, less than common and far from the
shape of an apple: Indeed, her head was wide at the base and tapered to a
point at the top; much like "zippy the pinhead".
The head was not mounted in the usual area of the body (nothing
between the shoulders; a headless dress had been especially made.)
Instead, her head was attached to her chest, between undeveloped breasts
and protruded through a custom hole in the dress. A white lace doily
surrounded the base of her head, she had no neck (she was "one of those
no-neck- monsters".) The little girl stood with a water can, watering
plants as her cone-shaped head continually rotated clockwise, 360 degrees.
As she came near us I could hear what sounded like ball bearings rolling
round, and round. Her head swiveled in a non-stop motion at a steady
speed, making it difficult to see her face. I was baffled and amazed over
her ability to retain her balance, despite the head's routine rotations.
There was no wobble in her walk, just the sound of spinning ball bearings.
As she passed us to water plants I began to feel myself tugged down
into the ground and found myself awake, laughing in bed.
It's just another day... "The mad-hatter"